Chapter 14

Getting to Know God

What if none of us was victimized by ignorance, apathy, or denial? I use the word “victimized” because we are. None of us is ignorant through choice, apathetic because we want to be, or denying our needs because it makes us feel better. It really makes us feel worse. Each of us has been born into a world and a society in which spiritual needs are commonly unknown, not taken seriously, or denied. Is that our fault?

But let’s say we weren’t. Let’s assume we were informed about our spiritual needs, we had a sense of urgency about having them met, and were completely receptive to the voice of God. How could we then develop a relationship with him as he desires?

How do you get to know anyone? Through communication. You might know a great deal about someone through a third party, but until you meet the person yourself, you can’t possibly know them. We can listen to people preach for hours, we can study the holy books of the various religions from cover to cover, and we can give fifty percent of our incomes to religious institutions, but until and unless we meet God personally, we can’t possibly know him.

In meeting people for the first time, we don’t necessarily place great trust in them. We’re not sure whether they’ll understand us, we’re not sure whether they’ll like us, and we’re not sure whether they will respect our confidentiality. Beyond that, we don’t know what they’ll expect of us and don’t yet know what to expect of them. If the relationships grow and respect develops, we’re much more willing to risk. We develop faith in them.

Why should it be any different when we approach God? Though he loves us, we may not be convinced of that. Though he’s worthy of our trust, we may not know that yet. Though he knows better than we what’s in our best interests, we may not be certain of that. Is he going to be threatened by our doubts? Not for a minute. We’ve got to remember that he is perfectly healthy spiritually. His sense of identity, worth, and security are not going to be threatened in the least by what one or another of us may think of him. God is incapable of becoming defensive through feelings of inadequacy.

Until we get to know someone well, we also have a tendency to watch what we say. There may be certain subjects we consider too personal or provocative for discussion. We may feel a need to choose our words carefully to avoid being misunderstood. These are common responses to meeting someone new. Though God knows more about us than we know about ourselves, we may not be willing to concede that immediately. Though he understands exactly what we mean even before we speak, we may not initially trust that understanding.

The notion that God expects absolute faith, absolute trust, and absolute dependency at the very moment we first respond to his voice is absolutely ridiculous. To assume that, we’d also have to assume that God doesn’t know anything about our nature, our conditioning, or our environment. Nothing could be further from the truth. He understands them better than we do.

If people hadn’t eaten for three weeks, would their first meal after that period make them physically healthy? Of course not. Our initial response of acceptance to God is not going to make us spiritually healthy. It’s simply the first step on the road to spiritual health.

Many different people are eager to tell us what God demands. God doesn’t even expect—let alone demand—anything we’re incapable of giving.

All God wants from us initially is the sincere desire to know him. If we have that desire and we express it to him, he’ll satisfy it. My first prayer was simply, “If you’re there and if you care, make me aware of you.” He answered it within a month. Anyone who sincerely seeks a personal relationship with God will have one. Knowing each of us as he does, God can respond to each of us in a way that we can understand. When we realize he’s responded, we know a couple of things about him. First, he’s there. Secondly, he cares. There is one caution of critical importance that needs to be issued and stressed emphatically: do not depend on anyone or anything to tell you about God more than you depend on him to reveal himself to you.

God reveals himself in different ways to different people. He knows each of us well enough to know how to communicate effectively with us. If we depend on any one or any thing more than we depend on him, then we restrict his ability to communicate effectively.

We don’t inherently know God just by attending church, however regular our attendance. If we think we do, we’ve restricted his ability to communicate effectively.

We don’t inherently know God just by studying the Bible or other sacred manuscripts. If we think we do, then we’ve closed the door on him.

We don’t inherently know God just by reciting professions of faith.

Most importantly, we don’t inherently know God just because others tell us we conform to their religious standards.

You can no more have a personal relationship with God by simply reading and worshipping with others than you can have a personal relationship with any other people simply by reading books about them and talking to their friends.

Absolutely nothing can satisfy our spiritual needs short of a personal relationship with God. In the absence of ignorance, apathy, and denial, each of us would have it. Because of them, many either starve or attempt to satisfy their needs with spiritual junk food.

God does not have to have identical relationships with each of us. We don’t have to have them with each other, so why do we try to limit him to that? Leading one person down one path because that would be the best path for them, he may reveal something that he wouldn’t to someone else on a different path. It’s not important that we validate what each other has learned from God. What’s important is that we learn from God. We won’t learn anything from him that is harmful to any or all of his creation. We’ll learn a great deal that can help us protect and assist in the healthy growth of the totality of his creation.

God can reveal himself through anyone or anything around us. As we learn to listen with our hearts and souls instead of simply with our ears and minds, we’ll hear him speaking to us.